All the decorations are down, boxed up for another year. I have to say it is nice to have the house back - feels as if there is more space for us.
Wooohoooo!
Wooohoooo!
Monday, 7 January 2013
Sunday, 6 January 2013
Wise words from Frugal Queen touch a nerve
This is our home and we jointly fund it. This is our life and we jointly fund
it.
For the LONGEST time I have struggled with joint accounts, pooled money and in fact pooling in general. This is not the same as sharing, if that makes sense. Big J is a pooler. It is all for us, for our lives, for our future. I have clung on to the old ideas and ways and it has been a struggle for both of us. I always want to have my own money (i.e savings) in case. In case what? Rarely does this money get spent, it is squirrelled away and kept. My pay goes into my bank account, then I transfer the overpayment for the mortgage into our joint account.... Other income comes into my account and again, I transfer that into a savings account in my name, although that money is without question 'ours'. By the end of the month after my humble outgoings, there is little left, and that goes into savings too.
All this reveals an independent streak that is very wide, but on the down side, it maybe shows a lack of faith in our shared values or is it our sharing values? I don't know.
We have a good life, a very blessed life. We have a comfortable home, want for nothing and most importantly are all in good health. BUT, I feel unsettled a lot of the time. I thought for the longest time that I wanted change. That I wanted the things around me to change. They aren't going to.
I am probably not going to either. Let's face it, at this age with all these weird habits it is probably impossible, but I think that what FQ said in her longer blog about budgets really hit a nerve. It is time I started to think more we and us and less me and I. It is time I started to accept that we both work our long, long ours for us and the kids. It is time to accept that if I am not happy with the way things are, I can get off my butt and have a go and get them the way I want them.
What a waffle for a Sunday morning, but the reality is, FQ, who is wise and lives her words, has inspired some serious self reflection and not a moment too soon.
It is not the 'what might happen' that counts, it is the 'what we are doing now FOR now and the future' that does.
Off to dismantle the Christmas tree and collect my wee girls, who will be a bit sad because Dada flies home today.
For the LONGEST time I have struggled with joint accounts, pooled money and in fact pooling in general. This is not the same as sharing, if that makes sense. Big J is a pooler. It is all for us, for our lives, for our future. I have clung on to the old ideas and ways and it has been a struggle for both of us. I always want to have my own money (i.e savings) in case. In case what? Rarely does this money get spent, it is squirrelled away and kept. My pay goes into my bank account, then I transfer the overpayment for the mortgage into our joint account.... Other income comes into my account and again, I transfer that into a savings account in my name, although that money is without question 'ours'. By the end of the month after my humble outgoings, there is little left, and that goes into savings too.
All this reveals an independent streak that is very wide, but on the down side, it maybe shows a lack of faith in our shared values or is it our sharing values? I don't know.
We have a good life, a very blessed life. We have a comfortable home, want for nothing and most importantly are all in good health. BUT, I feel unsettled a lot of the time. I thought for the longest time that I wanted change. That I wanted the things around me to change. They aren't going to.
I am probably not going to either. Let's face it, at this age with all these weird habits it is probably impossible, but I think that what FQ said in her longer blog about budgets really hit a nerve. It is time I started to think more we and us and less me and I. It is time I started to accept that we both work our long, long ours for us and the kids. It is time to accept that if I am not happy with the way things are, I can get off my butt and have a go and get them the way I want them.
What a waffle for a Sunday morning, but the reality is, FQ, who is wise and lives her words, has inspired some serious self reflection and not a moment too soon.
It is not the 'what might happen' that counts, it is the 'what we are doing now FOR now and the future' that does.
Off to dismantle the Christmas tree and collect my wee girls, who will be a bit sad because Dada flies home today.
Saturday, 5 January 2013
By George she's got it!
I got the job. Despite being very ill in the wee hours (still suffering today) the interview went well and a phone call last night confirmed that it was mine.
It means change. A move to a new office away from my fabulous friends/team. It means a lot to learn. I will be working with the Breast Cancer team, clinical and non-clinical staff. It means more responsibility and the challenge of that appeals. It may be a few extra hours a week, but the day off is not lost. The day off could become flexible, quite a nice thought.
Today I am alone again. The girls are in London with Dada, he flies back tomorrow. Adam is out. Big J is in Whitley Bay, catching up with work and friends.
I am not socially presentable in any way today. I have a nasty stomach bug and I need to be at home. Juno and Bosley are here with me. I would rather they see me than anyone else!
It means change. A move to a new office away from my fabulous friends/team. It means a lot to learn. I will be working with the Breast Cancer team, clinical and non-clinical staff. It means more responsibility and the challenge of that appeals. It may be a few extra hours a week, but the day off is not lost. The day off could become flexible, quite a nice thought.
Today I am alone again. The girls are in London with Dada, he flies back tomorrow. Adam is out. Big J is in Whitley Bay, catching up with work and friends.
I am not socially presentable in any way today. I have a nasty stomach bug and I need to be at home. Juno and Bosley are here with me. I would rather they see me than anyone else!
Thursday, 3 January 2013
Home alone
Big J has taken his Mum home, Adam is out. The girls are with Dada on the South Coast. I am alone, swatting for an interview and wondering if I have bitten off more than I can chew.
Juno is running wildly around the kitchen and in and out of the cat flap and poor old Bosley has slipped away for some peace.
Back to the notes.
Juno is running wildly around the kitchen and in and out of the cat flap and poor old Bosley has slipped away for some peace.
Back to the notes.
Wednesday, 2 January 2013
Birthday Boy
Big J celebrates his birthday today. He has had messages from friends in 17 countries.....quiet exciting that....We went to Devil's Dyke, as and we got nearer the weather got worse and by the time we got to the pub, there was no view to speak off. We did have a nice meal though even if we could not walk.
He and I met with Dada this morning in town and had a catch up about the girls. Hard to believe that in a week Hannah will be 18....
Tonight is another chill session. I am making banoffee pie. We all say we like it, but one slice is usually one too many!
He and I met with Dada this morning in town and had a catch up about the girls. Hard to believe that in a week Hannah will be 18....
Tonight is another chill session. I am making banoffee pie. We all say we like it, but one slice is usually one too many!
Tuesday, 1 January 2013
The New Year
is here. It slipped in while I was asleep. I did not celebrate with my family. I took myself to bed, cross, teary and feeling sorry for myself. Sometimes a big weep just clears things up. This morning the sun was shining and the sky was bright blue. It has been beautiful all day.
Big J, his mum and I took Juno for her first walk on the farm tracks. People greeted us and we them with 'Happy New Year'. Many stopped to pat Juno, puppies are hard to resist. Lots of dogs gave her the once over too. It was a very happy walk.
Right now there is a goose in the oven, occasionally spitting and popping and sending out worrying clouds of smoke. Thank goodness a recipe on the 'Net did say they tend to be smokey, or I would have given up by now, convinced the kitchen was about to go up in flames.
Dada is here from Japan - he arrived this afternoon. The girls will have a week with him and we are all hoping that this weather continues for a few more days.
Tempting as it is to think about the year to come and to plan and hope, the best thing I can do for myself and all my lovely family is take one day at a time and make it count.
Big J, his mum and I took Juno for her first walk on the farm tracks. People greeted us and we them with 'Happy New Year'. Many stopped to pat Juno, puppies are hard to resist. Lots of dogs gave her the once over too. It was a very happy walk.
Right now there is a goose in the oven, occasionally spitting and popping and sending out worrying clouds of smoke. Thank goodness a recipe on the 'Net did say they tend to be smokey, or I would have given up by now, convinced the kitchen was about to go up in flames.
Dada is here from Japan - he arrived this afternoon. The girls will have a week with him and we are all hoping that this weather continues for a few more days.
Tempting as it is to think about the year to come and to plan and hope, the best thing I can do for myself and all my lovely family is take one day at a time and make it count.
Saturday, 22 December 2012
Winter Solstice
I love it. It marks the end of long dark days and the very slow beginning of more light. We are a long way from having more warmth, but cold and bright are fine by me.
Big J and I took Juno for a walk last night. There was a hazy moon and the occasional fuzzy star.
This morning it is pouring, but we have been out in the garden. Juno scratches the door to be let out now. She is on my lap growling quietly as a plane flies out from Gatwick (about 10 miles away.) I suspect the plane is less interesting than her own little growls and half hearted woofs. It seems like a practice session really. It now seems to have kicked off hiccups!
Today is about cooking, last minute shopping, gift wrapping and cleaning. EVERYTHING needs a good going over.
Big J has suggested a morning meeting to plan the day....hope he is feeling energetic.
Enjoy your run up to the holiday.
Big J and I took Juno for a walk last night. There was a hazy moon and the occasional fuzzy star.
This morning it is pouring, but we have been out in the garden. Juno scratches the door to be let out now. She is on my lap growling quietly as a plane flies out from Gatwick (about 10 miles away.) I suspect the plane is less interesting than her own little growls and half hearted woofs. It seems like a practice session really. It now seems to have kicked off hiccups!
Today is about cooking, last minute shopping, gift wrapping and cleaning. EVERYTHING needs a good going over.
Big J has suggested a morning meeting to plan the day....hope he is feeling energetic.
Enjoy your run up to the holiday.
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