Wednesday, 9 July 2014

An end and a beginning

Today I did my last secretary day at the hospital for the forseeable future. I was not sad about that, only sad to leave my mad and funny friends. An ending. 

I then went to an open evening at the still only took 54 minutes to get there, but that is mid afternoon, what about mornings?

I had questions but got no answers other than the advice to turn up on the day and take it from there. Part of me loved that. Part of me worried there was no list to check off, equipment to buy, etc. But that is the way it is for now. I met a fellow student, as young as she could be to as old as I am. I liked it. It was a beginning, of sorts. 

Over the next few days I need to think about my parents, my Artist Sister, my niece and nephew and their lovely mum, my estranged sister, who has written again. It is a bit like catching a bird....I am keen to write back straight away, but think that if I give a slower, more considered and less emotive response it will be received better. 
I love to travel but I hate to leave my girls. I suffer from separation anxiety, big time. They know it, Big J knows it, but it does not make it easier. I do understand in my head now, (although not my heart) that people come and go and sometimes they go and do not return. That is not what I am planning, but by accepting it, it might make my own departure less anxious. A less anxious mum does less damage to her loved ones. 
What anxieties do you have regarding your loved ones?

No comments: